People react to this weather in different ways. The majority of people just want to be outside in some form, whether it's rolling around in the sand of the beaches, or having a barbeque with your friends, or just standing outside licking a lamppost to taste to heat. But with our brains subjected to temperatures unnatural for us, it's easy for our circuits to get a little fried.
Eventually, it comes to a point when the heat gets too much for people and we start complaining. Everything is sticky, there's fungus growing in your eyelids and your living room has its own ecosystem. You just try to make do until it passes and normality is returned. This blog is intended for that latter end of the summer when everything is too perfect to be enjoyable and you're at your wits end. Here's some things to keep you busy and to make the best of the situation. Here's some fun things, YOU can do at home with your very own summer heat wave.
First of all, why not fry an egg on your face?
The food will give you sustenance and with all that heat coursing through your body, you might as well channel it into cooking something delicious for your friends. With this trendy egg on your face, you'll be the talk of summer while looking undeniably fetch. Gretchen, stop trying to make fetch happen.
Bored AND lonely this summer? Why not make another you with all your skin peelings?
As if that wasn't good enough, with all this heat you can now pretend you're in a foreign country where bull fighting isn't just not frowned upon - IT'S MANDATORY!
**DISCLAIMER: Despite the lack of a bull, a tortoise is not a suitable replacement.
Finally, if all those things still haven't done it for you, and you just don't know what to do with all this heat, why not make a sacrifice to Helios - God of the Sun? He always loves a chat and a dead lamb.
Maybe with enough sacrificial blood squirted in the right direction, we can get back to a steady temperature and I can sleep better. If you're into that kind of thing, however. Maybe you just wanna have a Calippo and ride this heatwave like a brain damaged cowboy. This might be the only summer we get this year and before we know it, everything will be back to the way it's supposed to be.